A Quiet Thursday

I am glad today is a quiet day at work as it gives me time to ponder something Selina said to me how I balance being a Man, Dom, Daddy, Caregiver, Sadist and all around pervert.  While I am rather rusty when it comes to journaling you have to start somewhere right?

The funny thing is I don’t try to balance it, I am all of these things together at the same time. While aspects ebb and flow it makes up who I am. That pleasure I get from giving good  (I hope) advice, to being the ear that she needs to vent in, to the one who takes her in a firm hand. Like anyone I want to be wanted, need to be needed and to be valued for the things you bring is heart lifting.

I think we all have to find our balance point, how we align the shifting facets of our personalities moment to moment important. Where I feel we fail is constantly in suppressing one or more of our facets in favor of others. Granted there is a time and place to express or suppress portions of your personality, yet when you lose the balance, when one side is never expressed you start to fall…




A long quiet time

I think it is time to prehaps resurect this blog. I’ve spent a long time away from here, and from the world of D/s in general, struggling with depression, work load, and the fustrations of my body so I think it is time to pick journaling once more.

The time comes when an outlet is needed, we shall see how I make use of this going forward.

It’s has been a bit more than a week, perhaps 10 days since the reconnect. Like no time has passed between us, yet things are different, we both are wary of burning to hotly, too brightly and being consumed by the intensity of it all.  Yet it is still there smoludering just below the surface ready to flare in a microsecond.
Today even more so and perhaps it is more than just the connection, this side of me has been neglected for some time and it wants out. The Dom side, the sadist, the Beast wants out, needs an outlet, a way other than just being in my head to express some of this.
Do I dive into writing stories again? Is writing erotica enough anymore?